Pictures thanks to the amazing Emily Harris Photography, Balloons and tassel's thanks to Studio Mucci
I am so excited to finally be able to share that I AM PREGNANT! I have been dying to share this exciting news for so long. I honestly cannot believe I was able to keep it a secret. I am 14 weeks and I am so happy to finally be out of my first trimester. IVF worked for Matt and me, and I am overjoyed that I can share some of our experience with you.
Months ago, when I decided to share my struggle with infertility on my blog, I was very scared and insecure about opening up to people in such a public way. But, the responses and positivity I got from all of you have made me feel much less lonely during this challenging process. So, naturally, I have been dying to share this great news on my blog. Now that I am pregnant, I want to share a little about this wild, emotional, exciting, (expensive), and uplifting experience.
From the moment we decided to move forward with the surgery I had and IVF, I was really scared. I was scared of all of the hormones that I would be putting in my body and all of the side effects that I would experience. I was really scared of the shots as well, but most of all I was scared of going through all of this and it not working. Luckily for me, as it turned out I didn't have really any of the bad side effects. And from what everything that I read I really had an easy time with all of the stimulation.
Lucky for me I have the best husband! He was there for every doctor appointment and he gave me every single shot. I don't think I could have given myself the shots. I couldn't even look when he did it (I am a wimp). We did shots for about 2 weeks. It started with one then went up to two shots a day in the stomach. They were not as bad as I thought they would be. I had a great doctor and nurses and they monitored me closely so that meant going to the doctor every single day to get blood work and ultra sounds. That was tough but I was happy that they were really on top of the amount of medicine that I was getting and they would adjust it according to my blood work and follicle size to help keep me from over stimulating.
Finally when we were done stimulating it was time for the egg retrieval. That really was not bad because I was under anesthesia and didn't feel anything. We went home within a few hours of the procedure just to wait and see what was going to happen and when we could get our embryo transfer. We waited 5 days and it was finally time. We had the transfer and I literally laid on the couch for 4 days straight with my feet up. I was so afraid that if I moved to much that the embryo would fall out! Even though that technically isn't possible.
After the egg retrieval we had to start progesterone shots in the butt. OMG did those hurt. We had to do those until I was 8 weeks along. And my butt was bruised and sore. That might have been one of the worst parts of the whole process, in addition to the seemingly constant anxiety about whether the process would work. Matt yelled at me a lot to stop worrying so much, which is way easier said than done!
Looking back on everything, I get so emotional. Everything that we have been through, the surgery, every single shot, every doctor appointment and all of the fear of the unknown, it was all so worth it. Looking back I realize that this experience has made me a better and stronger person and it has made Matt and me closer than we have ever been. I could not have made it through all of this without him. I was terrified to go through this. It was hard for me to just take a leap of faith and to let go of control.
We are so excited to start this next chapter of our lives. Sometimes it still doesn't feel real. I never thought the words "I am pregnant" would come out of my mouth. I know this was all in Gods timing. This experience has made my faith so much stronger. I feel so blessed that I was able to go through this and to be pregnant. And to start a family with my amazing husband.
So this explains my lack of posting over the last three months. I am not going to complain at all because I am just so happy to be pregnant and I will take what comes with it. I have just had all of the normal first trimester symptoms. I have had nausea 24/7 and I have just been so tired all of the time. So many days I just couldn't get out of bed! Now that I am in my second trimester it seems to be getting a little better. I can't wait to have all of my energy back and just feel myself again.
We find out the sex in two weeks! I am literally dying to know. I have not bought one thing for the baby yet and I cannot wait to start shopping. We have been to a couple of baby stores just to look around! That was overwhelming. But I have so many things that I know I want to get and I cannot wait to start preparing!
If you are in a similar situation and have any questions or just need someone to talk to feel free to email me! I know it can all seem overwhelming and I would love to help if I can.
Thank you all so much for reading and for all of the support and positivity over the last few months. It means more to me than you know!